Self-care through Boundaries
“If you don’t prioritize your life, somebody else will.” ~ Greg McKeown
The gentle art of boundary setting can allow harmony and productivity back into your life. Learning to say no can be one of the simplest and most powerful tools to allow you to focus on your life and goals and protect you from other people’s agendas.
How to start saying ‘no’
- Tap into your values (define your values and use these as your guide to choosing activities).
- Separate the request from the person (saying no isn’t about the other person, it is about self-care)
- Focus on what you will gain by saying “no” (will you gain some quiet time? time to read or walk or rest?)
- Recognize the personal cost of saying ‘yes’ (will this add to feeling tired, frustrated or powerless in your life?)
- Be clear rather than vague and non-committal (“No” “No thank you” “Not right now” are examples of being clear.)
- McKeown also uses examples like “I am flattered that you thought of me, but I’m afraid I don’t have the bandwidth” or “I would very much like to, but I am overcommitted” or “I am going to pass on this”. The world will continue rotating and you might just gain a little of your own time back.