I’ve never talked to anyone. I’m used to handling things on my own. Aren’t people who go to therapy weak?
Not at all. People who ask for help know when they need it and have the courage to reach out. Everyone needs help now and then because people often continue operating through old stories that are unseen or subconscious.
“A therapist is trained to point out things you may not be seeing, feeling, or putting together about your life story. This frees you to live a new story instead of continuing to loop through the old one.”
What’s the difference between talking to you or my best friend or family?
“Therapy is a series of non-ordinary conversations. By non-ordinary, I mean that the talk in therapy is about things you usually try to keep hidden from most other human beings – or even from yourself. Therapy is a place to let go of an ‘it’s all good’ ways of presenting yourself . . . an opportunity to speak about what may feel unspeakable with a non-judging, compassionate human being who can help you hold in a new way what has kept you confused, hurt, ashamed, or stuck.”
It is helpful to consider the structure of therapy and the therapeutic relationship as well. The therapeutic relationship “will not extend to any other form, such as friendship, romance, or business partnership. By avoiding multiple roles it stays focused on its sole purpose: soul healing. Therapy talk is one-sided; that is, the focus of the conversation is always on the patient’s healing.”
Therapy is completely confidential, with a few legal exceptions. You won’t have to worry about others ‘knowing you business.’ If your situation provokes a great deal of negative emotion, and you’ve been confiding in a friend or family member, there is the risk that once you are feeling better you could start avoiding that person so you aren’t reminded of this difficult time in your life.
Why shouldn’t I just take medication?
Medication can be effective to relieve some symptoms of distress, but it does not resolve the true problem at the root. Sometimes medication can be helpful in conjunction with counseling. Our work together is designed to explore and unpack the problems you are experiencing and expand on your strengths and skills in order to resolve problems at the root.
How does it work?
Because each person has different issues and goals for counseling, it will be different depending on the individual. I tailor my therapeutic approach to your specific needs. We may take a few sessions to explore your concerns and what contributes to them and then build goals and the steps to move toward healing and freedom.
“The non-judging, compassionate caring that therapists offer can help you see that you don’t deserve the abuse you’ve lived through or the self-judgment you often heap upon yourself.”
How long will it take?
Unfortunately, this is not possible to say in a general FAQs page. Everyone’s circumstances are unique to them and the length of time counseling can take to allow you to accomplish your goals depends on your desire for personal development, your commitment, and the factors that are driving you to seek counseling in the first place.
I want to get the most out of therapy. What can I do to help?
“Therapy invites you to be accountable to another human being (your therapist) for working on your life between sessions, much as you would need to practice piano between lessons. This gives momentum to dealing with things that may be easy to avoid or put off for years.”
Getting the most out of the process is dependent on you actively participating in between-session work and practice. As a matter of fact, your active participation and dedication will be crucial to your success.
Quotes above taken from Spirituality & Health, May/June 2023 Issue, Demystifying the Talking Cure article, pps. 14-15